Re: watching your girlfriend or wife...
The pleasure in watching your partner engaged in sex with
someone else is just that. You can watch pornos and see people
having sex with others and you get turned on. A similar scene
involving your partner is twice as erotic. You know your
partner better than anyone else, you know what turns him/her
on and what drives them wild in bed. Seeing them aroused
is a turn on in itself. You need to have a strong relationship
and an openess about sex however; it is not for everyone.
Our first experience was with another woman and watching
Den go down and pleasure her orally turned me on greatly
because I know how good h is and how great that feels. There
was no jealousy or feelings like "he should only be
doing that to me". It was hot watching him. He has told
me that watching me go down on her was just as hot. Our second
experience involved full swap swinging and Den said that
seeing me on my back with my legs wrapped around another
man waist as he was pounding away at me was erotic. He didn't
think that he would particularly enjoy seeing that. I guess
men and their caveman, "this is my property"
attitude might have it a little tougher than us girls. My
heart belongs to him and him alone and his belongs to me;
nothing will change that. Adding another into the bedroom
is another way to bring spice into your sex life. I don't
know too many couples who haven't tried pornos, books,
magazines, dildos, vibrators, sexy outfits, food, Kama
Sutra, Tantra, etc., etc. to add spice into the bedroom.
Swinging is just another form. You can ask anyone in the
lifestyle and they will tell you that the best most erotic
and sensual time was alone with their partner, as it should
be. They will also tell you that seeing their partner with
another is very hot! Try videotaping you and your partner
and then watching it, start out with that. Moving on you
can do some "soft swapping"; i.e., being with
another couple but having limited contact. Watching another
couple having sex right in front of you will definetly turn
you on. Being able to reach out and possibly caress him/her
as they are "involved" gives you a sense of being
involved with them. If you and your partner can handle it,
move on if you want. You need to have some rules and discuss
all of this way ahead of time. There are many great articles
about rule making and safety written by some good people
here on Adult FriendFinder. You can also try going to a "couples"
club. A "couples" club is a place where you can
interact at your own particular comfort level. You can
have a fun time from just watching another couple have sex,
to having sex with your partner while others watch, to joining
another couple, to an all out 10 person orgy if you wish.
One of the biggest turn ons is seeing your partner being
pleasured, you watch him/her having fun in life with other
things, hobbies, pastimes, whatever, why not with sex?
Warning, it will bring your relationship closer, you will
need to have a close tight relationship when you see your
man pounding away at a woman or see your women taking another
man's cock down her throat. The turn on is definetly
there, but it is not for everyone. I don't particularly
enjoy nipples clamps and ass slappers but that doesn't
mean that everyone else can't enjoy those things.
You either like it or not; no one can sway you one way or the
other. If your partner enjoys something and wants to try
it and you are dead set against it, well...these are the
types of discussions that couples should have done when
they first met each other and started dating. You should
have already known that your mate enjoys dressing up in
a all latex outfit every once in a while and wants to chase
you out in the backyard, lol or likes to be tied up and spanked,
already known and somewhat enjoy it as well. Swinging is
just another sexual desire; seeing your mate involved
with someone else and knowing that you helped make that
happen is very erotic!
Hope this helps...
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