Words women use (Humour)
WORDS WOMEN USE
FINE - This is the word women use to end an argument when they
feel they are right and you need to shut up. Never use fine
to describe how a woman looks. This will cause you to have
one of those arguments.
FIVE MINUTES - This is half an hour. It is equivalent to the
five minutes that your football game is going to last before
you take out the trash, so its an even trade.
NOTHING - This means something, and you should be on
your toes. Nothing is usually used to describe the feeling
a woman has of wanting to turn you inside out, upside down,
and backwards. Nothing usually signifies an argument
that will last Five Minutes and end with the word Fine.
GO AHEAD (With Raised Eyebrows) - This is a dare. One that
will result in a woman getting upset over Nothing, and
will end with the word Fine.
GO AHEAD (Normal Eyebrows) - This means I give up or do
what you want because I dont care. You will get a Raised
Eyebrow Go Ahead in just a few minutes, followed by Nothing
and Fine, and she will talk to you in about Five Minutes
when she cools off.
LOUD SIGH - This is not actually a word, but is a nonverbal
statement often misunderstood by men. A Loud Sigh means
she thinks you are an idiot at that moment, and wonders why
she is wasting her time standing here and arguing with you
over Nothing.
SOFT SIGH - Again, not a word, but a nonverbal statement.
Soft Sighs mean that she is content. Your best bet is to
not move or breathe, and she will stay content.
THATS OKAY - This is one of the most dangerous statements
that a woman can make to a man. Thats Okay means that she
wants to think long and hard before paying you back for whatever
it is that you have done. Thats Okay is often used with
the word Fine and in conjunction with a Raised Eyebrow
Go Ahead. At some point in the near future, you are going
to be in some mighty big trouble.
PLEASE DO - This is not a statement, it is an offer. A woman
is giving you the chance to come up with whatever excuse
or reason you have for doing whatever it is that you have
done. You have a fair chance with the truth, so be careful
and you shouldnt get a Thats Okay.
THANKS - A woman is thanking you. Do not faint. Just say youre
welcome.
THANKS A LOT - This is much different from Thanks. A woman
will say, Thanks A Lot when she is really ticked off at
you. It signifies that you have offended her in some callous
way, and will be followed by the Loud Sigh. Be careful
not to ask what is wrong after the Loud Sigh, as she will
only tell you Nothing.
Send this to the men you know to warn them about future arguments
they can avoid if they remember the terminology.
And send it to your women friends to give them a good laugh.
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