Regarding the Idea of Soul Mates
Regarding the Idea of Soul Mates
I like the lighthearted aspects of Adult FriendFinder, and must admit Im
not in it for any serious, constructive, or destructive
reason.
Mixed in with casual sex seekers, I often read postings
from both genders, sex starved, lonely, or both, that reflect
disappointment and desperationalmost as if Adult FriendFinder was the
last resort for some lonely or sex starved souls, and has
failed them. One might wonder why the oversupply of lonely
males doesnt fill the over-demand of lonely females,
and visa versa. But, it seems that lonely females arent
interested in lonely males, etc.
It appears to me as though indications of desperation are
turn offs to otherwise desperate, would be mates. In other
words, I desperately need a lover who doesnt desperately
need me (then, Ill feel insecure because of not being needed).
So what Im trying to convey is that symptoms of desperation
send warnings about overly serious would-be lovers. Such
warnings should be heeded, because self-centered obsessives
are likely to be controlling lovers, in other words, oblivious
to their mates boundaries.
I suggest that dating services, marriage brokers, etc.,
are better venues for serious-minded, singles than a sex
site such as this is. Im not saying that if someone can lighten
up a bit, Adult FriendFinder wont lead to a one-on-one relationship, but
anyone who is hung up on finding a soul mate is likely to face
rejectionand rightly so.
Its my guess that men are more likely to buy into this soul
mate nonsense than women. Its also my guess that men are
more likely to become stalkers. Im not insisting that
there are not soul mates. My feelings for my late wife who
died in 1980 of lung disease could carry me along in that
direction. But I also realize theres an element of god-playing
in soul mate thinking.
I have to tell myself that Im nothing special, even if my
wife was. So, I went to a dating club, met another girl, she
moved in and we helped each other raise our kids (I each).
After 22 years as domestic partners, we finally got married
2 years ago so she could partake of my military retiree benefits,
and, other than one anothers boundaries, we still dont
take much too seriously. We did OK; the kids are grown and
are also getting along. So, who needs soul mates except
men (and sometimes women) who want to run roughshod over
some other poor souls rightful boundaries using the BS
that You must be mine; its in the stars.
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