Married and lonely? This story is about you.
Youre rather nervous. You look around anxiously. Many
people sit chatting and drinking. Theyre all in groups
talking and laughing and you are there alone. You nurse
your drink slowly. The female bartender gives you an occasional
glance, presumably to see if you need another refill, but
also out of curiosity; shes not used to young attractive
women sitting alone, competing with her in her own bar.
Of course, you know youre early. Dont be early you told
yourself. Fashionably late would be better. He told
you 8 oclock but you didnt know how long the drive would
take. It was less than the 90 minutes you thought it would
be. Now its 7:50 and youre already into your second gin
and tonic. Better stop after this one, you tell yourself,
in case you have to make the drive home tonight.
Getting ready was fun. You cant remember the last time
you got dressed for a date. The school-girlish nervousness
was an exciting feeling. The drive down was fun too. The
road to this small town is not that long but you had never
driven it before. Funny that. Driving along the stretch
of winding country highway, you were imagining how you
could have lived there for so long and yet never took the
time to drive here. A little piece of your life, missed.
But now is catch-up time, you tell yourself. Thats why
you are here.
You see a couple sitting in the corner. You suddenly think
of your husband and imagine where he might be. Probably
flirting with some ditz at the other end of the country.
He takes extended business trips all too often. But you
dont care about that anymore. You arent here out of spite.
Youre here for you. To prove that you are still beautiful.
And possibly for more than just that.
A few people enter the bar. You look across, trying not to
look eager. Butterflies dash around in your stomach, although
now somewhat dampened from the drinks that you have been
trying hard to just nurse. These people are in a group. No
single guys. None especially tall or lean. Nobody like
the photo youve stared at for hours.
Oh hell, its not even 8 oclock yet. Better get another
drink after all. The bartender gives you an inquiring look
but says nothing and pours another.
Some guys in the bar have been taking not-so-discreet glimpses
your way. Youre used to that. But now its different because
you are there alone. One guy has been especially conspicuous
with his glaring. His girlfriend is giving you dirty looks
too. At first you were uncomfortable with it, but now it
makes you smile. Maybe thats the alcohol. Or maybe youre
finally starting to loosen up. He takes another peek over
his pint of beer. You reach for your drink on the bar, twisting
yourself perhaps slightly more than necessary, causing
your skirt to slide up just a bit. A little leg show across
a bar never hurt anyone. You can feel his girlfriend glaring
into your back. You do that woman thing with your head, shaking
your tossed hair for extra effect. You wonder what she would
think if you told her boyfriend that you had nothing on under
that skirt.
The funny thing is, hes not even cute. But its exciting.
You suddenly realize how much you are enjoying yourself.
You feel very sexy and quite relaxed. Maybe you should have
gone to bars by yourself before. Even without planning
to meet someone.
But this time you have a date. A blind date. Earlier in the
day you were having second thoughts. You considered skipping
out. Some guy you met on the internet, for Christ sakes.
You cant even remember placing the ad. You might have been
at home one evening, a bit tipsy, and feeling hot and bothered
with nobody around to take care of your needs. But he responded
to that ad. He responded to your needs. Gave you someone
to share your thoughts with. He seemed like a normal guy.
Looked kinda cute in the photo he sent. So here you are. Sitting
in a small pub, in a town youve never been to, waiting for
this stranger from out of town to come in and sweep you off
of your feet.
Youre not sure what might happen. You might share a drink,
make small talk, and then thank him for a nice evening and
leave. But you no longer feel too nervous to consider sex.
You havent been with anyone but your husband for so long,
it might be fantastic to feel the touch of another mans
hands on you. But you feel relaxed and unconcerned. Whatever
happens, happens. You have the whole night ahead of you
and the possibilities are endless.
Your train of thought is suddenly broken. You can feel his
presence before you see or even hear him. You suddenly know
hes there. Sitting right next to you. You turn and look,
and hes looking at you. You see those eyes youve been desperate
to see for all this time and theyre smiling back at you.
Ill have what shes having he says to the bartender,
who suddenly seems more at ease with you. Gin is nice, you
have good taste, he says to you, after taking a sip. Cheers,
and heres to us. He smiles at you as you clink glasses.
You talk for a while. He had a good flight, except for a snoring
guy sitting next to him on the plane. You had a nice drive
down through the countryside. You share a laugh when he
tells you about the rental car they gave him which makes
funny beeping noises when in reverse. You tell him about
the gawker and his girlfriend across the bar. He glances
at them and chuckles. You smile when he tells you that you
are much more attractive than the girlfriend.
He looks nice - just like his photo. He had already told you
that he was 62 but now he seems taller than you imagined.
He also has more of a tan than the picture, but its summer
now. Hes well dressed. Has a cute goatee and a nicely shaped
head with shaved hair. He looks younger than his 30 years,
but doesnt act it. He talks casually, just like his emails.
He makes you laugh. You notice that you feel comfortable
being there with him.
Suddenly driving home is not an issue. You order more drinks.
One for you and two for him - you tell him he has to catch up.
He is a sport - downs one, grins, and takes a sip of the other.
The two of you chat for what seems like hours. You catch yourself
thinking about what you expected, what you hoped and how
hes turned out to be in person. You wish he was a bit more
flirtatious. A bit more aggressive. He does complement
your appearance on occasion but so far he has kept his hands
to himself. You arrange yourself to show off your legs as
much as possible. You giggle inside as you catch him taking
furtive glances at your exposed knees.
Im not wearing any underwear you blurt out. Oops - was
that the alcohol talking? But it doesnt matter. Youre
enjoying being this relaxed. And if the alcohol is helping,
thats ok. He controls his surprise at your comment, pauses,
and says I know. Then, to calm your sudden horrors, he
smiles and says No, I didnt see. I just surmised.
You ask him where hes staying. Ive got a nice little place
for the night, not far from here he says. You ask him if he
can show you.
The bar is gone from around you, replaced by the inside of
a car. You giggle when it makes funny beeping noises as he
backs it out of the parking lot. You are enjoying the alcohol
induced warmth that has surrounded your senses. In the
darkness of the car you can take glances at him. He smiles
when you reach over and put your hand on his lap. After a few
turns youre driving along a broken dirt road. The car jumps
a bit from potholes and rocks. Your hand accidentally
slides up his leg with each bump. He pretends not to notice
when the back of your baby finger brushes against something
in his trousers. You pretend not to notice how hard it felt.
Its funny how you didnt think anything of the dirt road
until just now. You wonder what kind of place he could be
staying at. But then you are there. In the headlights of
the car you see a little oasis in the woods, occupied by only
a picnic table and a tent, and surrounded by tall evergreens
on all sides. He helps you out of the car and sits you at the
picnic table. You have a half a thought that you may get your
suede skirt dirty on the bench but immediately dismiss
it. It doesnt really matter.
You watch him as he lights the fire in the firepit. The warmth
of the fire adds to the warm feeling inside when he sits next
to you. His arm around you, you continue chatting into the
early morning. He tells you about his earliest childhood
memories. He shares his goals and aspirations with you.
You tell him some of your own fantasies - things that youve
never told to anybody. You dont want this to end. Sitting
and chatting and snuggling by the fire. You are excited
about what might happen later, but for now you want this
to last and last.
****
The next day, while driving back to where you live, you smile
as you remember the details of the evening. You cant remember
the last time you made love until well after the sun rose.
In fact, you cant remember ever doing that. You also cant
remember the last time you screamed out loud from the sheer
ecstasy of sharing your body and your orgasm with someone
special.
You have promised to email each other. Hell keep you up
to date on how his life is going, on how he achieves the goals
that he shared with you. Youll do the same. Youll probably
never meet again, but you will be connected forever.
_____
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